Inspiration

Today I have had the honour to spend time with some of my closest friends. It was quite an inspirational night. I had the opportunity to meet interesting people at the Wired community. Many of whom had attended were starters of companies and young entrepreneurs. It made me realize how much more I needed to socialize. I was not good at the passing the ball. I was only good at catching. However, nonetheless it made me realize how much potential there is in the future for me to expand my horizons (I know it is an old line). But, through all the interesting discussions of sustainability, inspirational lectures, and just plain talk it made me realize how effeciantly I spent my time. Not quite efficient enough and I want to do so much more now.

I have been missing out on a lot all my life by focusing on all the wrong things. I need to find purpose driven goals and the way to achieving them rather than finding a purpose for a goal.

Objectivity

It is something I lack... the thing that makes someone rational, gives someone clarity, and the ability to recognize when they are biased and narrow minded. That is objectivity as its definition proceeds, "judgment based on observable phenomenon and uninfluenced by emotions or personal prejudices" . Ever since I was little I have always been an emotional person and sometimes that feeling has always got the best at me.

I'm always looking for acceptance from others and that has often created the need of narcissism because I'm worried about myself being judged. However, whenever I look at the bigger picture I often realize how silly it is. But, no matter how hard I try it's become a major part of my life to think too much about myself (something that I'm steadily working on).

I just wish the world were free of societal pressures that force people into roles that they do not want to play. However, it's always there in our lives and I guess the best way to deal with it is to accept it for what it is. Not care about what others think and live your life for what it was meant to be. To be yourself.

These kinds of feelings will often eat at your soul and just harbouring them without a word let out will not make it anybetter. They will at least most certainly cause people to spawn jealousy, greed, and bitterness. I constantly have to remind myself of these things and this is not the type of person I want to be. If I want to be free of prejudices I simply have to not care of what others think of me even if they do not like my personality they will have to get use to it. I simply want to try my best and fulfill my dream... Pi...

I'm kidding, at least on the last sentence I was. How could anybody follow Pi? Unless it were in a circle. But, I guess... life is in a circle and that's what this blog is all about. In fact, it's a growing circle and as you run around it and make a lap it gets bigger and you have to run much faster to make the same lap and that is why things seem to move so much faster as you grow old. The art of math... engineering... science... are all connected in this world and that is what I want to set out to explore. For the world has so many interesting connections that one would not think of. The traditional view of these fields of studies deserve a change.

x²

Had my last entry be the only entry for this month. My blogging pattern would have shown properties of the function x². This is just a note I wanted to start this entry on and that is coincidences do happen. You know but sometimes it's questionable. I've recently had this feeling of the world that somehow just the body of knowledge and the mindset of human beings on the planet are somehow connected. Before somebody tells me this is painstakingly obvious - listen to what I refer to. Through all our actions and behaviour that we show everyday I have a feeling that we have a subtle affect on each other to acquire new knowledge. For example, there was a study on crosswords and that two groups of people were selected to do crosswords except one group did the crossword on the day it was released and the second group did it the day after it was released. The second group did significantly better. So how did the knowledge of the words get to the second group in order to make them have a much higher score? Coincidence? Maybe. But, this is just something to think about.

As for my everyday life. I sometimes wonder about how I gone about wanting to become an engineer. Was engineering meant for me or was I meant for engineering? What would have happened if I had actually achieved my previous goals of becoming an actor? I certainly am not cut out for it now. But, the experience of it lives on and all that studying in acting definitely made a difference in my life.

Another Day Another Blog

Thus far, this summer has been quite educational and yet quite boring. But, amongst all the boredom I truly believe that this has probably been one of my more productive summers. I have learned a great deal about myself and had a lot of time to self reflect upon important things such as how handle situation, how to be responsible and the way I interpret my surroundings. Apart from those things were my younger cousins and that I learned about their everyday lives and subculture in the small town of Guelph.

Upon getting home I almost instantaneous was susceptible to all the foreign yet familiar dust particles that my body had immediately reacted upon. This did not however, distract me from my thoughts, and that was I have been questioning my major as of recently. Certainly Mechanical Engineering is what I've originally aspired for. But, now I really want to question whether it is what I want. I know that Mechanical Engineering is definitely a popular trade out there. However, I've been concerned about where all the focus in the development of technology has been going. How far does mechanics go before I hit a road block or find it very difficult to touch upon new discoveries. A lot of the credit these days appear to go to chemical engineers for synthesizing new and exotic materials that the world has never seen before. Computer engineers continually develop more advanced software and interactive user interfaces for people to work with. I however, start to question where has the discoveries of the mechanical engineer come into play these days?

A silly question though, because as I type I most certainly start to realize that mechanical engineering is interdisciplinary and that having access to new synthesized materials could in fact give us more raw materials to work with. Not to mention come up with cool inventions. However, thus ends my train of thought. For you readers out there thanks for reading I hope that you guys have found some mild entertainment out of my rambling.

A little understanding

Everyday, I begin to understand more about being a big brother. Although, sometimes I feel pressured by my uncle to complete tasks on time. I think I'm doing okay. It's a great experience to work with all kinds of people and not to mention to be able to diversify yourself. For every person that you come across in your life their qualities seem to rub off on you and you understand more about the people around you and also yourself.

On the other hand I am getting a bit distracted as of late have not been planning ahead (which I should). I need to stay focused on my readings or else I may not be prepared for next year.

Chemistry... Chemistry... Chemistry...

dot dot dot... These days I've been reading my chemistry book in preparation for next year. The goal is quite ambitious and I have a lot of skepticism about being able to complete it. At the same time I still require to improve my English. If I apply for a transfer credit in chemistry I would not get a response until I was 2 months into the program. Not to mention I need to take a first year English course and I had not taken English in 2 years. My schedule currently holds 7 courses in the first semester and 6 in the second. But, you know. I don't mind. I want to be able to discipline myself.

I also face a lot of scrutiny for I am guilty of not transferring my math credits and taking on second year level math. It is just that a part of me feels ill-prepared. The part of me that did not give my all in Calculus 2 and Linear Algebra. The worst part was that I still ended up with a good grade that I did not deserve (one of the courses were coordinated terribly) and there is no satisfaction in a reward not earned through hardship.

Kids...

Hello everyone,

Right now it's 2:45 am and I haven't gone to sleep yet. That's because I'm having a hard time falling asleep. I can't help but think about the way I'm handling the kids at the moment. I have let myself move off track and may need to set my priorities straight.

It's amazing at how silent the night is yet my mind is undergoing chaotic turbulence. I need to find a way to let off steam and writing a blog may not be the most effective thing I could do to settle this.

It's just that I want to do a better job of taking care of my younger cousins. Not because it's what I'm here for. But, it should be something second nature to me. I mean isn't the desire to do good to the family and helping out what any person who's fortunate to have one suppose to do? Aren't I suppose to look over those that are younger than me as to make sure they have an easy childhood? Hey, maybe the approach I am taking is not so great.

But, you know some day I hope to have kids of my own. I want to be the best parent I could possibly be and seeing as there are so many roles out there. The first to master is simply to be a big brother - easier said than done. This includes being more reliable and prioritized. Always putting others before yourself. Always try to be enthusiastic. I should always make that my goal... I feel I still have a lot to learn.

Residence Offer!

Just in, I got my residence offer! Here are some floor plans of my possible future residences.

Tis' a calm night

It's always all inspiring to watch my younger cousin play the piano. To me it's a symbol of accomplishment, a strong resolve, and the feeling of chasing a goal. It's a great to just watch. But, it must be better to do it yourself and I know that in order to do so I must work hard. I must think less and act more.

Well, this sucks. As I now must inform you I was given one of the last choices in order to pick my time tables for next year. Every half hour it seems a wave of students are given priority over me to get a chance to pick their time tables and I did so well last year too! If you are not familiar with what I am talking about. UBC has standard time tables set up for students each year and people who have scored the highest grades get first dibs to pick their time tables. So eventually these tables sell out fast and are too full to be registered in. My first choice along with my 7 or 9 backups were all filled out. I can totally understand though because high school students have never attended a post secondary institution. What I'm saying is it totally sucks for me!

Random Thought

Don't you ever like thinking about the world and whether there is something you can do to make it a better place? Like if there was a day where everyone could do a good deed to someone in their life or an act of random kindness. How much better would this world be? But, things like that can never be so simple for us and I don't know why.

Why is it that in some cases we're able to come up with intelligent questions or answer equally brilliantly and yet we're so irrational when we get emotional. I always seem to like to wonder about the essence of human nature as it must be one of the most fascinating things in the world.

Not to mention that with better understanding of human nature which is sometimes irrational suddenly becomes so logical by your feelings. Anyways, that is the end of my thoughts and I must be getting to sleep now as it is late.

Good Night All,

Behold my next post! Today, well... technically yesterday I was looking up the blog squad at UBC and was thinking of joining their team. At the same time I feel intimidated by the feelings of a several readers peering over my writing - which is in fact a lot of pressure. I tend to over think things in situations like that which hinders my writing a lot. I hope you're all enjoying my little blurbs. They're not much, but for now they're all I have to offer.

Max Fitness

I just got back from exercising. These days my body feels significantly healthier because every time I work I burn more and more calories. The feeling of nausea is beginning to fade away. My calorie burning has went as follows.

Session calories(j)
1..............300
2.............400
3.............500
4.............800

I hope to aim for 1000 next time. But, most likely I will be jogging so I will need a step counter to keep track of my burnt fuel. On other notes, I've been practicing my arithmetic consistently and it has been improving significantly faster each time with increasing number of digits. Although, my method of addition is a bit awkward. I may have to backtrack in the near future in order to calculate more efficiently rather than using the wrong way for the rest of my life.

I plan to keep up on my calculus review. Also, I am waiting for OSAP that is taking way too long... I am getting a bit nervous because the deadline nears. But, I will be in Guelph for awhile. It's putting me on the edge. When will OSAP send me notice?!

Today, I took up the opportunity to call a guy hiring window cleaners. For others I know it is not that big of a deal. But, if you knew me it was really hard for me to talk to other people and get over the nervousness because of my lack of people skills. But, this time I felt it was okay and that it helped a lot that I called even though I didn't get the job. Well, that's probably my last hope of a summer job. He told me to call back a week later in case one of the guys he chose didn't work out. Honestly though, how many people can't climb ladders and wipe windows? I won't keep my hopes up. But, I'll definitely call.

Slowly I am beginning to review my calculus. I hope that I can have mastery over it along with various other subjects before my study at UBC. Inside I cannot contain the feeling of excitement despite my outer appearance. I really want to start fresh but at the same time maintain the deeming qualities in which made my year at Ryerson successful. I will never forget Ryerson for what they have done for me. Despite what others say it is still a big loss in many ways in which not everybody would immediately understand. I was given a comfortable life there, my finances were garaunteed, and I had good professors and a lot of freedom. However, this time I have chosen to be on the more adventurous side and pursue that otherside of me. Who knows what will become of me next year. But, I would like to follow my insticts this time and experience all the world has to offer.

Another late night and boring summer. Today, I did nothing but practice arithmetic and play starcraft. Definitely not a way to score points with girls. I really need to find something else to do. This is the first time I've ever experienced such a long and boring summer.

Woohoo! My first post and well... my blog is finally up and it's 4:36 in the morning. It took only three hours to think of a name! My body feels very heavy. I think I will go to sleep.